Sunday, May 31, 2009


The other day I stumbled upon something wonderful...something magical...something that I hope heaven will be like........

It was a blog party where everyone shows their thrift store/yard sale finds! Seriously I shed a few tears I was so excited!

I have always been a second hand shopper. It thrills me to NO END. Actually many of you might have received "gifts" from me because I cannot pass up a deal and usually can find someone to give it to.

I always get SO excited, only to be disappointed when Noah isn't as thrilled with my finds when I come home.

Here is the answer to my problems;-) This will probably become my down time, guilty pleasure (browsing other people's finds that is).

Head over to Southern Hospitality if you want to see what I'm talking about.

So I'm going to show you what I discovered this weekend at Goodwill this weekend!

These three paintings for $5. I have a friend who is having a little girl and I think these would be precious in her room.

Cute little sheep!

Precious pink pigs.

This one looks a little bit sad to me, so she may not want that in a nursery, but I'll offer it to her.

A gorgeous piece of art ready to frame. I'm totally pro breastfeeding so this picture will hang proudly in my home:-) I love the sage green matting.

My favorite find. A very chic magazine rack. I've been looking for one for about 6 months. This was $4. I'm going to give it a new coat of black and it'll be good to go!

Some 18 month Puma shorts that didn't seem to ever have been worn for my little boy. I have tons of 0-9 month clothing but not much after that. So I always pick up clothes for that older size, I know I will be glad I did when Barclay outgrows all his clothes. I don't know how WHITE holds up with little boys though...
These were $2

Some cute brown overalls. 18 months. $2

These are totally my least my style for my baby:-) 18 months for $2.

I bought these notecards new for $3. They are beautiful black and white pictures of babies and their parents. I love them. I thought about framing a couple of them but I am realizing that I have plenty of my own to frame. These will make beautiful baby shower cards though.

Original price was $16!

I was really excited to find this because I was reading THIS on Southern Hospitality and I loved the lamps! I am horrible at sewing, not to mention don't have the time, so I was so excited when I found this lamp shade, already covered in Burlap for 99 cents. I'm going to monogram it with a "G" and it will be perfect!

This is a beautiful old clay bottle with an old cork in it. I saw it and my imagination went wild! I have a fascination with being ship wrecked and writing love letters to my long lost love...through a bottle of course. It was only $1.50 and the perfect color for several of our rooms.

This is a very interesting old lifeguard chair model. It was $2.50 but will look so good in Barclay's nursery since it is a semi nautical theme.

I know I just had a baby, but this crib bumper was so adorable and was only $3.99. It is the prettiest colors. I thought I'd buy it for my "next" baby but realized that I'm probably going to sell it on Craigslist for $20 so that I can use that extra money for next weeks treasures:-)

Not Myself

I had a wonderful couple days down in Charleston with all my sweet cousins and family. We played games, went in the ocean, talked, shared stories, and ate really good food.
Through all the wonderful times, I couldn't help but notice that I was not myself. This got me to thinking...what was myself?
It's lost in sleepless nights and the day after day of completely caring for a human being that isn't yourself.
Do not get me wrong. This is what I've always wanted to be...a mom. Every single day I cannot believe that God has blessed me so much!
But I'm changing and I'm not sure if I like it.

When I found out I was pregnant, I was immediately met with people, close friends, saying..."Oh now that you'll be a mom, I guess you can't do anything anymore." This hurt me and frustrated me to no end! So I set out to prove them wrong. To prove that I will still be the same.
Four months after Barclay's birth, I realize that no matter how hard I tried, I am changed completely.
Gone are the days of running out to the ocean with Noah and diving in for hours. Gone are the times when I could sit and talk with someone without
a.falling asleep from exhaustion
b.letting my mind wander to whatever might be going on with my baby.
c.relating everything to Barclay because he's on my mind (and needs to be on my mind) 24/7.

Tonight Noah and I went to a new church to try it out. It meets at night and it closer to our house. We were too exhausted to make it to our regular church this morning. I was sitting in the back, completely isolated while Barclay cried and cried. I could read the worship music lyrics and tears were pouring down my cheeks. I love worshipping the Lord through song. But I also felt such loneliness. Not just then, but in my life. I have so many wonderful friends who keep up with me and call me and visit me. I feel loved FOR SURE! But I do feel alone right now. And I feel it's my fault I feel alone. I'm so wrapped up in my daily survival and also daily enjoyment of Barclay that I can't see outside of it. I can't see myself and I definitely can't see anyone else.

I've written before that I am such an extreme person. This might have to do with my "balance problem". This loneliness. Because I'm giving 100% to Barclay and I feel used up for anything else. I love the feeling of giving 100% to my baby. I enjoy him beyond belief, but I hate that I am just out of it when it comes to other people.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Working Mama

Ahhhh I'm so sleep deprived, and so worn down, and soooooo tired of editing pictures.

I didn't realize when I decided to do 20 + photo shoots in a month that not only was I taking the pictures (the fun part), but I would have to upload, edit, export, burn, blog (another fun part), mail, etc all 20 of the photo shoots...all pretty quickly, too, since everyone is getting married soon and needs their pictures.

*Note to self...start this process in March next year.

I am totally discouraged because I have sat at this computer for about seven hours today just going through pictures after pictures after pictures. They are all starting to blurrr together into one giant mushy ball of LOVE!

Now don't get me wrong. I am a big fan of LOVE. But geez after editing thousands of pictures of couples gazing into each other's eyes it gets a little much.

I guess what I'm saying is that I've almost reached the point where I'm loosing the giddy feeling when I see my photographs. Just because of the sheer quantity of it all.

I wish so much I could take my time and just do a perfect job for everyone, but it is physically impossible.
My goal this year was to charge more and make it so I could take my time with everyone...but the recession had a different idea in mind.

I totally do LOVE my job though. I did a wedding this weekend and was very encouraged by it. Not only were the people genuinely nice, but they appreciated my work so much. It's the kind of deal where I feel like I want to go above and beyond for them.

This is stupid, I know, but I get so discouraged when I pour my heart and soul into a photo shoot, spend hours editing and getting everything just right. I feel excited about the photos and when I send them out...nothing. I check me email like a crazy lady waiting for them to tell me something...anything (perferably good things) about my work. This happens a good amount and my husband(who is the kind of detatching himself from unpleasant work situations) tells me, "Helen Joy, if you expect feedback, you should just include it in your contract!"
True true.

So I'm tired and this is totally rambling...but I guess to sum it up:
I love my job (if I only had to do picture taking and blogs)
I love good feedback (who doesn't)
I have a freaking lot to do so I better stop not doing it!

Friday, May 22, 2009

My Dining Room:-)

It's Friday again so that means Show Us Where You Live Friday at Kelly's Korner.

Today is Dining Rooms.

I love our dining room and we actually use it a good amount. It's in the same big room as the kitchen so I usually use it as counter space when I cook as well. My husband and I LOVE to have company and we host a lot of dinners.

My mother was always open for anyone to come over for dinner, she's taught me so much about being a good hostess.

I always show a before picture to show what my room really looked like this week...

Not too bad, in my opinion. Let's see we have a random assortment of:
Gripe water, dates, french press, clear glasses, cooler, salad bowl, scarf, business card, address I tore out that I need to keep, mail, duster, IB profen, Christmas candy?
It's sort of a dumping ground for us and since there are only 2 adults who eat at this table daily, we usually just clear one end.

A better view for you.

And now after only 15 minutes of cleaning and vacuuming.

A view of the whole room.

I love my dining room set! I worked hard for it too. I worked at World Market doing the furniture building and semi truck unloading for a couple months and used my discount to by this table and 8 chairs (I have two still not built in the box). This line got discontinued and it was my favorite. I ended up paying about $300 for everything. Which is a steal! It's heavy duty solid and heavy. I love the color and the modern shape.

I got these pretty heavy beige drapes at Ikea. I love them. I still have yet to hem them though. Long drapes are in right?!

Sticks my mom gave me for Christmas in a vase she spray painted and a few bottles of wine.

My wonderful "china cabinet". I looked forever for a china cabinet that didn't scream GRANDMA and never found one I liked. When I was working at World Market, I was in love with this book case. I drooled over it constantly. I told my husband I wish we could buy it but it seemed silly to pay that much for a book shelf. He suggested we use it to display our white china on. What a brilliant idea! I love how it looks! Plus it's really easy to get out and put away.

A view of my china. I love the contrast with the dark wood.

This African lady is a hand carved sculpture that my mom bought for me for $3. She's where I get my thrifty shopping from:-) I absolutely love it and put it with my Charleston baskets that my Grandmother gave to me. I love the yellow against the light blue.

And here is my baby...happy camper! Don't worry, I don't ever leave him up there unless I'm standing right there. He's our little centerpiece:-)

A MUCH needed day at the spa.

Yesterday was my 4 year anniversary and Noah and I decided that instead of paying to stay in a hotel for our anniversary, we'd rather enjoy the day together without the baby. We decided to go to the Grove Park Inn Spa for the day! It's the hotel we stayed at for our honeymoon, 1st and second anniversary.

So, I had a REALLY bad night with Barclay the night before we went. So bad that I almost couldn't physically get out of bed. I was beyond exhausted and the thought of all the things I had to do to get ready and take the baby to Noah's Mom's house seemed to counteract the idea of a spa day.
Non the less, I got out of bed, spent more than an hour packing (yes I did pack a whole suitcase full of things Barclay might "need" that day). Noah was having major issues with a contract that was supposed to close that day and so I was on my own. I was also trying to nurse and pump at the same time, trying to get every last drop I could. Not really a good feeling.
So we finally get loaded up in the truck and I'm crying already. Because I'm so tired and so frustrated. It was a stark contrast to how our other anniversary mornings have been.
We dropped off Barclay with Noah's Mom who was so sweet to take him for half the day (my mom took him the other half)...Thank you Mom's! I was ridiculously sad to leave the little guy, especially when it seemed like I was leaving him for a man who was going to be on the phone all day long working out real estate glitches.
I have to say it was THE MOST FRUSTRATING MORNING. We finally get to the spa and spend 30 minutes in the parking lot while Noah tries desperately to resolve all the constant issues that arose. (by the way, the contract was supposed to close the next day and they had to make a switch last minute).
I wasn't necessarily mad at Noah, I was more frustrated for him. Here we were standing outside a spa...just standing there doing business that should have been able to wait till tomorrow. I could feel poor Noah's frustration grow as I cry harder (laying on the top of a trash can) and his clients keep calling.
Finally he told his clients, "I'm shutting my phone off" and we were free. We had to wait 5 minutes for my tear stained face to clear up and the puffiness to go down before heading into the spa.
During the registration, I only cried once when they asked me about my baby...Pretty I good I thought.

By the way, the best thing about SPAs is that you can't have your cell phone on! A blessing straight from GOD!

The minute we walked in, I just melted. The smells, the sounds, everything reminded me of 4 years ago when I was a newly wed. All the stress instantly went away and Noah and I turned back into the love birds I know we are...deep deep down.

To say this day was needed is a HUGE understatement. Going into the day I would say our marriage was at a 4...maybe and coming out I felt like it was a 9 (because I know it'll never be perfect).
We kissed a lot! We snuggled a lot! We napped. We ate. We TALKED and not just about the baby or problems. We talked about goals and dreams. We kissed even more! I felt swoony around him again.

We then when our separate ways for our treatments (since as I previous posted, I refuse to get massaged next to Noah and his loud utterings of delight).

I signed up for a mountain honey wrap. I didn't quite know what it was, but it was safe for nursing moms and it only had a 30 minute massage period since I'm not a fan of massages too much. My mom joked with me before hand that she would rather do anything but be wrapped in honey.

OK, please don't be jealous, but I'm going to recount this AMAZING experience in it's entirety.

First I meet my MALE masseuse. He was the only one left when we booked. I was a little freaked out, but I had to get over it. He asked me if I was nursing and I said yes, so he started asking me about my baby. I just cried a little bit.
He took me into a round soothing room. First of all I had STRIP and get under a sheet. Gulp! I was not aware of this part at all. Doesn't everyone get treatments in swim suits? So I'm laying on a table and suddenly become quite aware that my boobs have not been relieved in quite some time....6 hours to be exact. He was really nice and put some towels under me to help cushion the pressure. Much better. The then took a brush and brushed my skin lightly to exfoliate. I was thrilled! I am always asking Noah to itch my back. Since I've had Barclay I've become very itchy. Probably because I never apply lotion because I never have time! Then he rubbed me down with honey and corn meal. It smelled sooo yummy and I love being rubbed! Hate being massaged, love being rubbed. At this point, I didn't care who was rubbing me, I just relaxed into a place I'd not gone for a while. One without spit up, crying, nursing, etc. Then I had to get up and shower off while he prepared for the next step. Of course the shower was covered and of course he never saw me naked, but I have to say...this was just AWKWARD! I guess I didn't hear him tell me to tell him when I got all the honey I just waited and waited for him to tell me to come out. Seriously 10 minutes later! He asked if I was done yet. I was like...yeah forever ago. After that awkward moment had passed, I climbed on the table to be rubbed again with Shea butter and rose oil. My skin was drinking it up and I was completely relaxed. He then wrapped me in a sheetlike thing and left me with heat lamps on me and hot stones placed in strange places that actually felt good. He rubbed my scalp and my face and my feet. My favorite place that I had no idea I like rubbed was my stomach. Throughout the whole thing, all my self consciousness melted away. I found myself thanking the Lord and my body as he rubbed every part. For example, "thank you for my strong calfs! They got me through many big hills in Korea." or "thank you for my soft belly, it housed a baby". By the time he was done, I was soft and relaxed and tried to get his address so I could write him a thank you note!
Noah and I laughed when we were scheduling these because the lady said that mine was "nourishing" about 50 times. But truly, there is no other word for it. Even though it was a male, I felt like I had been loved on by my mother, or sister, or husband. I just felt completely...nourished.
Thank you Noah for that wonderful treat!

Then we got all cleaned up. I put on MAKE UP and brushed and blow dried my hair and we met upstairs for dinner. I always want to get dressed up but find myself always running late and never having the time to look pretty. I felt beautiful, Noah complimented me all night long, I even had an older lady come up to me at dinner to tell me how pretty I looked. It was the love showing through!
Noah and I got to our dinner reservation a little early so we sat at the bar and ordered cocktails, all the while laughing about 4 years ago when I tried at that exact place to order a cocktail (I was 19) and how miserably that failed:-) We drank our drinks and kissed and sharing our anniversary letters. His made me cry it was so sweet. I haven't felt so loved and special in a long time. Then I dragged him out in front of the live band and we danced. Pretty soon others joined us. Then we had a lovely dinner with wine. No dessert though since not only were our tummys full, so were my know we hurried back to our car to pick up Barclay from my Mom's house. I pumped 8 oz in like 25 minutes! Yikes!

I have to say, this day meant the world to me. I've feel so caught up in Barclay and his daily ups and downs that I feel like I never have the energy or stamina to maintain a good relationship with Noah. Especially since our relationship has always taken a lot of hard compromising! I felt truly encouraged and am looking forward to many MANY more years with Noah.

We ended our day when I fell in a hole while trying to see my Mom's new goats...hehe.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

A little wonder

Today I had so much to do but I just had to take a few moments to enjoy the sun with my baby and of course take some pictures.

I've set up a lot of photo shoots in my life, but I think these are my favorite photos of all time. They are sweet.simple.and they really make me remember the emotions I'm feeling now. My mushy lovey emotions:-)

That's what makes a good picture in my opinion. One that really brings you back to that time in your life emotionally. I think these pictures will do that for me. In fact, I know they will.

I love the rolls on his back, his sweet little neck and that darling profile!

My favorite picture of all time! He holds me like this all the time. I can't get enough of it!

His precious little froggy legs!

Round tummy!

Holding his toes...his new discovery...

Sometimes in the business of life I have to stop and simply wonder at things. I'm glad I did today.

Also 4 years ago...

It was on our 3 year anniversary last year that I took a pregnancy test at 6 am. Here's the story:

I had taken about 10 pregnancy tests in the past two months and had seen so many negative signs. I used to be positive that I was pregnant and pray every time I would wait the three minutes to see the result.

I bought one because I was having symptoms again and thought I would go ahead and take one on our anniversary because IF it was positive, it would make a cool story.

I hid the test in our luggage since we were going to a little bed and breakfast. I hid it partly because I wanted to surprise Noah and partly because he would have been mad at me for buying yet another pregnancy test.

You know how it is when you want to take a test... You have to wait for the "morning pee" and you can barely sleep. I got up as soon as I woke up and ran to the bathroom. It is always a trick to hold your pee in long enough to get the test out of the least it is for me.

I seriously was just going through the motions and was expecting another negative result. I didn't even pray! I all the sudden look over and the word PREGNANT was glowing from the stick.

Previously, I had planned to surprise Noah with a cute little speech later that day about how he was going to be a Dad (IF the test was positive).

That all went out the window when I saw that little word. I started shaking like crazy and ran into the room and jumped on the bed screaming.

"I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant! You're going to be a Daddy!"

Noah's response was deer in headlights. He was rudely awakened from his sleep and couldn't believe it. I tried to show him the test which resulted in him screaming,
"Get that thing away from my face, you peed on it!"

Typical Noah:-)

Four years ago Barclay was the size of a poppy seed and now he's a beautiful baby boy who isn't so little anymore.

Here are things Barclay is entertaining me with these days:

Holding and sucking his sweet feet
"Talking" very sweetly to different inadament objects.
Grabbing everything...especially my hair.
Holding little softees when he goes to sleep.
Laughing when I kiss his neck.
Grabbing at his toys.

I can't believe that I am a Mommy now and that it's only been a year from the day I saw that word on that stick to this.

Thank you LORD for my blessing!

How did I do?

Soo...on my agenda for today was:

Pump about 20 oz of this even possible?
(ummm yeah...not possible for me. 6 oz and I'm toast. Poor Barclay will have to endure a little formula tomorrow.)

Keep Barclay alive and happy.
(he's alive and he was happy for a grand total of 1 hour today.)

Edit 5,000 pictures.
(I did 3,000. Plus I took 200 more of Barclay:-) )

(Thanks to Reba and her yummy send homes last night I did!)

Teach 1 lesson.

4 years ago...

Tomorrow I am going to be celebrating my 4 year anniversary!

Walking to my husband...

At the end of the aisle.

I will never forget the feeling I had when we closed the door to our decked out ford Taurus and drove off after our wedding. We were covered in bird seed, completely exhausted, and filled with the most unbelievable joy! I swear if I could bottle that feeling...

We decided after a lot of searching that we wanted to spend our honeymoon close to home. Really close to home. Just 20 minutes up the road in Asheville. We didn't tell anyone where we were going, to avoid pranksters:-)

That 20 minutes was so precious! Being able to finally take a minute and reflect on what we had just done! We got to talk about all the good and bad things about the wedding. We held hands and over and over again called each other husband and wife. We also waved at people the whole way up hwy 26. Little did I know when I was waving and smiling, my face was surrounded by the phrase, "I'm getting some loving tonight!"

When we pulled up the Grove Park Inn (an old very well known Inn in Asheville), we got out at the front and gave our car to the valet. I had imagined the following scenario countless times in my head. I entered into the ballroom with my dashingly handsome husband. We were still in our wedding clothes and right when we walked in (during cocktail time) everyone clapped for us. I love attention so I was just eating it up:-) Then we registered as Mr and Mrs George at the front desk. I'm sure I was the most goggley eyed bride the concierge had ever seen. I was practically hyperventilating and was clinging to Noah like...well like a new bride:-)

Noah got pretty much the deal of the century and we were staying on the club floor. So they took us up in a special elevator. My heart was pounding out of my chest. They took us in the room, explained the complicated shower to us and then left us. They left us. In our room. We were alone and it was OK.

Noah and I made the decision as young teens to save ourselves for marriage. That night was the first night we had ever spent together. It was so strange going from always avoiding the appearance of evil and always having to refrain, refrain, and refrain to completely together.

I wont go into the details of the night, but I treasure them in my heart.

I will never forget the feelings I felt that night as the reality of the beginning of me life with Noah sank in. We woke up probably 10 times during the night and whispered..."can you believe it husband?" "Can you believe it wife?"

The next day, we were scheduled for a couple's massage at the spa. It was the first time that I was called Mrs George:-) Our couple's massage included champagne and chocolate covered strawberries. I remember being so worried because I was 19 and I didn't want them to bring this up in reference to the champagne. I was married and didn't want to feel like a child.

They took us in this little room and massaged us.

*Side note:

I have not since this time ever been massaged next to Noah, nor will I ever. He breaths sooo deeply and makes all kinds of sounds. The whole time I was thinking, "I can't believe these sounds!" I'm so embarrassed!"

Than they left us in a heart shaped tub filled with bubbles and rose petals (hey, it's cheesy, but when else are you going to do it?) They brought in champagne and sparkling water (for me, since they did see I was 19) and strawberries.

They explained to us that the room was ours for the next hour. They would warn us 4 times before coming in. They told us we cold use anything in the room...tables, chairs, etc! I was completely embarrassed. I couldn't believe they were leaving us in that little room to do...*gulp*.

Well even though it was romantic and I give my husband big props for setting it up, it was more funny than romantic.

The bath was not really shaped for a Noah plus wife. We were squished in together like sardines, and giggling like crazy because we got stuck and water was overflowing everywhere. Then we decided to try and "use the room", but since we'd been married less than 24 hours, this became very impossible and comical.

I was SO embarrassed when the spa person finally came in (after four warnings).

We had the loveliest of honeymoons with lots of funny stories that I'll save for another time.

Tomorrow, I'm turning over my baby to the moms and Noah and I are taking that 20 minute drive back to the Grove Park Inn Spa for the day. I'm so excited! Although we aren't getting massaged together (for my previous stated reason), we are going to spend 12 quality hours together swimming, soaking, talking, sleeping, and reliving the precious memories.

I have to say that marriage year #4 was by FAR my favorite so far. We started our 4th year off with a positive pregnancy test at 6 am telling us we were parents. It just got better and better after that. I've treasure the months that we spent preparing for Barclay and enjoying the last of our childless days. I feel like we took advantage of every single moment.

I will say that my previous favorite day (May 21, 2005 was recently replaced with a new favorite day February 4, 2009). To watch the husband that I pledged my love to years ago become a father, and watch as we became three was beyond amazing.

I'm looking forward to another year with him:-)

I love you Noah George!


your still-googley-eyed bride:-)

Today's Game Plan

Adgenda for today:

Pump about 20 oz of this even possible?

Keep Barclay alive and happy.

Edit 5,000 pictures.


Teach 1 lesson.

Tomorrow is my 4 year anniversary and Noah and I are going to a spa ALL DAY LONG! I'm beyond excited!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Barclay and his tummy problems

OK, I just have to write this out and if ANYONE has any advise other than what I'm doing...I'm all ears.

I am beyond frustrated. My poor baby is constantly in horrible pain from acid reflux. He has been off and on Prevacid since he was three weeks old. I've tried to take him off of it about four times but he gets so bad that he cries non stop for hours upon hours and I can't take it.
I have tried probiotics.
I have gotten off of dairy for two months.
I have recently gotten of all gluten.
I have given him his medicine.
I have let him sleep at an incline.
I have let him sleep flat.
I have bathed him. Held him.
I have let him cry it out (not for more than 10 minutes at a time).
I have walked with him.
I have driven him.
I have given up so much and it is still hurting him.

Yesterday was a really awful day as far as crying goes. He used to cry all the time but would without fail sleep in his car seat when we drove. As of a week ago, he hates his car seat and screams blood curling screams every time I put him in it.
Yesterday I kid you not, he screamed for an hour. We pulled over about four times on our way down to Greenville and made sure he was all taken care of, nothing worked. He was shaking and sweating he had cried so much. I have checked the car seat for anything that could be poking him. His straps aren't too tight. But we have to go places, and he has to be in the car seat.

I feel like I have exhausted every possible solution. The pediatrian has recommended Reglan, but there are TONS of lawsuits against them right now and the side effects are pretty major.

I am going to try to EAT some dairy and gluten and see if that works (maybe he just wants cheese like his Mama). He seemed to be WAY worse after stopping the gluten.

I am going to not eat anything spicy this week, although I have to admit I "tested" this a while ago and it didn't seem to phase him.

The next step I feel is to stop nursing...which KILLS me. I love nursing my baby and I think it is the sweetest thing. Not to mention the cheapest thing, most convient thing, most healthy thing...etc. But if it comes between horrible side effects and my selfishness of nursing...I have to choose to stop nursing. Seriously I cry every time I think about it. I was planning on nursing maybe up to a year give or take, and this just makes me sad. I feel like I've given everything I can think of up.

Thankfully, his gas problems are a lot better. I think those are pretty much straightened out as long as I give him Gripe Water every four hours...but this acid thing is AWFUL.

He wakes up because he projectile vomits in the night. I am awakened by a gurgling baby. Yesterday he spit up so much that there were puddles on the floor at the coffee shop we were in. I also feel like I'm feeding him more often than most because he spits up everything he eats. He sometimes (although less lately) spits up clear acid. He cries A LOT during and after feedings.

I've even tried nursing him upright.

What am I doing wrong?

I've heard to try rice cereal, but I have gotten a lot of negative feedback on this.

Home Sweet Home

I feel like I've been traveling for a month! I've been here and there and my suitcase seems to always be in the living room waiting for me to wash the clothes and pack it right back up again.
I do looove to travel, but with a baby, it just seems like it takes 10 times as long to do everything.

I was so excited to be able to drive with my mom to visit my sister who lives in Jacksonville, NC. Her husband is gone for 9 months to Iraq and we wanted to keep her company. She didn't know I was coming and didn't know I was bringing Barclay (who she hadn't seen since he was 2 weeks old). My mom dropped Barclay and I off at the top of her street and I put him in the stroller. So mom, Sarah Grace and the boys went and saw Katie Beth, and right when they were going inside, I showed up! It was a great surprise.

I LOVE being with my sisters and Mom. For one thing, we laugh all the time, we have so much fun even if it's cleaning or doing projects, plus I really feel like there are other people like me. I see where I get so many of my quirks. It's so nice and comfortable.
I had the most relaxing time with everyone. I felt like I could be myself and we just talked and talked and talked and laughed and laughed and laughed and cried and cried and cried. WONDERFUl!

Near the end of our wonderful time, I started getting homesick! Not only for my husband but for our lives together. Because although I love getting together with my "older" family, I've started a family of my own! We have our little quirks together and I missed them. Noah has truly made my life better and together we have created a family. I don't think I've ever quite realized this before.

Noah called me when we were driving home and told me that he missed Barclay soooo much...and me. It was so cute!

Isn't it amazing how God blends two people together to create a family?


I just got back from a VERY wonderful church service. I have to admit, since Barclay has been born, I have not been able to concentrate at church at all. I usually have to step out when the sermon starts because Barclay gets fussy and I'm not comfortable with leaving this fussy baby in the nursery yet. So I haven't felt fed with God's word lately.
We almost didn't go to church today. We had a wonderful time a friends party last night and didn't get home till after midnight. Barclay was fussy, I was tired, it was rainy, I didn't really get up till 10:15 (although I was just playing with Barclay in the bed, not sleeping). We have to leave before 10:30 to make it to church on time since we live in the boonies. Everything was against us going today but we both took a quick shower and made it to church just 10 minutes late.

Our sermon today was about something I've struggled with my whole life...Heaven. I felt the whole time that our pastor was just taking my thoughts and turning them into words. He opened with the sentence that most Christians think of Heaven as the only other alternative to Hell. Maybe it's not that great, but it's not burning for eternity.

My whole life I've been terrified of hell. I remember my sweet mother praying every single night that when I was ready I would ask Jesus to be my saviour. At 4 years old I did, then at 5 and 6 and about 10 times afterward. Mostly because I was scared of going to hell. I went to a lot of VBSs and camps. You know, the ones with the invitation. I'm not joking when I say that I went forward to be saved WAY more than once. Sometimes because I wasn't sure and sometimes because I thought if I went forward, the pianist would stop playing "Just as I am" and the preacher would feel like he did his job for the day, because one lost soul had been saved.
My doubt is another whole post in itself...

But I'm just saying, my fear of hell was a driving force in my coming to Jesus.
I come from a missionary family. Not my immediate family, but my mother's parents. I wanted so much to be a missionary and to be a witness for Jesus.
I remember one time while swimming at a pool, I scared the living daylights out of a little boy swimming there with my stories of hell. I also told him about what Jesus had done so he didn't have to go there. Then I paid him $1 to get saved. My family was so proud of me for leading someone to Christ at such a young age...and I didn't have the heart to tell them that I paid the poor guy.

Heaven has never sounded fun to me, definitely better than burning forever, but it always sounded so boring. I would hear of people exciting and longing for heaven and it just always baffled me. Why would I want to go and sing all day long? Why would I want to give up my hobbies, enjoyments, relationships here on earth to be in an ETERNAL state of worshiping? It just sounded awful to me! And I don't think I've ever really said that out loud. I felt like, no matter how bad things get here on earth, I would not want to trade it for eternal boredom.

Oh how my heart has been lifted today! Our pastor, Josiah, used the passage of 2 Corinthians 5:1-5

1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. 2Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, 3because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. 4For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

He also used lots of examples of Jesus and his death and resurrection. I can't remember all the references, but this is what I got from it:

-We will have relationships. In fact the Lord is creating a new heaven and a new EARTH. It's going to be a perfect, without struggle, without pain, without war, without jealousy, without tiredness EARTH. I will be living an eternal life without the struggles of money, without the disspointments of government, without the sadness of loss.

-We are going to work and have hobbies and eat and drink together.

-We will be able to be creative in heaven. We will have the time, energy, resources to be creative! Being creative is something that keeps me ALIVE! What a joy to know that it wont stop, it will just get better!

This is the part that really warmed my heart:
-I am going to have a relationship with God that is so intimate. I am going to know everything about him, there will be no questions. There will not be a mystery or a struggle to know God because he will be right there knowing me!

Midway through the sermon my sweet husband took my fussy baby out in the hall to bounce around so that I could finish listening. I'm so thankful! Because I feel comforted and even...maybe a little excited about heaven now:-)

Because I'm not so good at explaing things, click HERE to download and listen to the sermon.

Friday, May 15, 2009

My Guest Room:-)

It's Friday again and I'm doing Kelly's Korner blog tour of homes. Today we are showing our guest rooms.

I've really enjoyed this blog tour for two reasons:
1.I get to look at all sorts of houses and get ideas.
2.It's really given me the incentive to take a little extra time and do the things that I've been meaning to room at a time.

Of course, I always like to keep it real with a before photo. This room has been in limbo for the past 5-6months and today I finally felt like it's presentable.

My husband and I both work out of the home so we are constantly finding the right place for the home office. We've moved it three times in the past 6 months and since we've had the baby we've decided this room is the only room that will work for it. So we had all sorts of papers, books, gift wrapping from all the wonderful baby gifts we've received (and I've yet to write thank you notes for!). Also, since my husband snores and I cannot reach a deep sleep because I'm listening out for the baby, this room has been my room for the past two weeks. The nursery is right next door AND I've gotten some snore-less sleep. I'm moving back into my room tonight though.

This room used to be mushroom brown (a lighter brown) and it used to be my least favorite room. It had no pop to it. We decided we wanted to paint it darker, and my husband took it upon himself to make it his project. Plus I was pregnant and could't paint because of the fumes. Well, let's just say, he never finished and after the baby came I had to enlist the help of friends. (Thanks Cat and Mom!). It is now complete and I LOVE it!

Here is after I cleaned for just an hour!

The bed with my miracle quilt on it.

Story of the Miracle Quilt: (long story, but totally worth it!)
I was 9 months pregnant and on a budget for some last minute things before the baby arrived. I was feeling anxious about fitting everything in the budget, and also anxious about a lot of unfinished projects around the house. I went to Greenville, SC to get the shopping done. One place I visited was TJ Max. I looked around at their baby things and didn't find anything in particular. I did find THE QUILT that I wanted so badly for our guest room. In the past we've just used old blankets and I've always wanted to buy bedding for it. I loved this beautiful green and white toil quilt and it was a pretty good price...$40. But...I knew I just couldn't because I was buying so many other odds and end for the baby and post pardum care. So I left. I was exhausted, cranky, sad, discouraged...from all my shopping and decided to cheer myself up with a quick trip to the 99 cent a pound Goodwill (which I LOVE love love). Maybe I was just too tired, or maybe it was a bad day, but I was finding nothing. I found a couple burp clothes and a onezie and was standing in line to purchase them. Usually I come out with 10 or so pounds of pure gold. I was even more discouraged when I saw a tag sticking up out of one of the many bins of clothes. I find what it was attached to...a really ugly brown jacket. The ticket said TJ Max so I decided to buy it. I could give it as a gift or maybe take it back and get $5 or so of store credit. I decided the jacket was just too ugly to give so I decided to give it a try. Outside of TJ Max, I shook out the jacket, trying to rid it of some cat hair and braced myself to hear that it was so old that they didn't have it in the system anymore. I took it in and told them I wanted to return it for store credit. I was shocked beyond all belief when the lady said, that will be $45 on your store credit today. WHAT?!?! I was so shocked I could hardly breathe! So guess what I bought? The quilt! And the credit totally covered it. By the way the jacket cost less than 50 cents. I just think it was God giving me a little boost in my last month of pregnancy. I cried and praised the Lord the whole ride home!

I love my "G" pillow. I love monogrammed things and this is one of the only things I have that is monogrammed. I love our iron wreath that I bought while working at Pier 1 a couple years ago.

Our computer where we both work with some pregnancy pictures and an oil painting my mother in law gave us.

A view of the whole room.

The side table with fun books for guests to read, and of course some pictures of Barclay! I moved this from our room because it matches better in here.

One of my favorite paintings I've ever done from college. It looks better in person. It's a landscape of a flower field. I painted it in a flower field...and there are even little bugs in the paint!

Our bookshelf, which I hope to paint white someday. My three little owls (I love owls!) and my iron key.

Wedding scrapbooks and an iron candle holder. I love that willow tree angel that a sweet friend gave me.

Another picture of Barclay and a cool bottle we got for our wedding.

Picture of my sweet friend Reba on her wedding day.

Inside my closet. I've covered the doors with magazine inspirations for my photo shoots since I'm a photographer.

Fun pictures!

I'm so blessed to have a guest room! I am totally into hosting people and having a guest room makes that so much easier on me. I've lived in 7 other houses since I've been married, and this is the first place that I've had a place they where I don't have to pull out a couch or pull out mattresses from the closet.

I hope you enjoyed this little tour of my guest room.