Tuesday, September 7, 2010

I have a tired mind right now. It's like everything is just so much mental energy, that I'd rather not try. My voicemail is full...with messages several days old. I can't bare to check them because I know it will lead to more things I need to do, but yet don't want to. It's not laziness because in the past couple of days I've managed to get out of bed and really start getting this crazy house back in order from my 3 month hiatus due to puking my guts out every second. I've been working hard and seeing results...like the 6 baskets of dirty laundry is clean and PUT AWAY. It's more relational laziness. I feel like when I'm talking to someone at church or out and about, I almost fall asleep. I have so many, SO many good friends. People I want to stay friends with for the next 20 years. But for some reason I'm so overwhelmed with the people I'm not keeping up with. I think I'm also turning inward and wanting to be homebody with just me, Noah and Barclay. I have been on the road non stop for the past...lifetime and I'm just enjoying my home and wanting to stay here. My sister is staying with us for the next couple of days and I cried when I found out she was coming a day early. Not because I don't want her here. Not because she's an inconvenience. I love her and I want her here. It's almost like I feel I'm being robbed of quality time with Noah. And I feel awful about it. It must be something God put in us women at this point in pregnancy. A serious, strong urge to nestle in our nest with our family.
Oh I miss socializing and I know I'll be back to my crazy running around before too long, but right now I want to curl up with Noah on the couch and watch Barclay sing and dance.

1 comment:

  1. I can totally relate to that. I get like that sometimes. Well, a lot. I just LOVE my husband so much that it feels like hanging out with other people is just stealing our time from each other. He has to be gone at work for SO long every day.

    Maybe your sister can watch Barclay so you guys can have some alone time?

    I am so happy you are starting to feel better! Yeah! Your spirits will raise along with your energy; just give it time. . .

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