Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Soul Searching

This past month, I feel like I have done a lot of soul searching. Asking big questions about what the purpose of my life is, how to be better, how to have balance, who I want to surround myself with, etc.
I can in all honesty say that this past week has been one of the most content weeks of my life. Sure there were frustrations and sadness, but as a whole, I felt like this past week has been exactly what I've always wanted my life to be...normal.
Yesterday I made homemade minestrone soup. I cooked away, with my sweet baby playing on the floor. I folded laudry that consisted of Noah's big shirts and Barclay's tiny ones, I bathed and played and videoed. I shopped and nurtured. I scrubbed toilets and organized papers. All very normal things. But I cannot tell you the joy that I have doing them. I can't believe how the Lord has chosen to bless me so abundantly.
Tonight, I swayed in the nursery with a sweet little snuggly boy nestled in my neck. I prayed for him and hummed to him and I was hit that this is my life. The life I've always wanted. It is soooo not perfect, but it is such a blessing and I love every minute of it! Toilets and all!


  1. I love those moments of sheer surrender. How blessed you are indeed!

  2. *tear* I think I already know what you mean! Care giving always seems to me so simple, too simple for that to be our true "purpose." But then I realize how important it is, and fulfilling...and that God calls us to take care of and love each other...and it is such a blessed calling!!

  3. Wow, way to make me get a lump in my throat. How wonderful that your week was awesome. I've learned to enjoy where I'm at right now and when I do that, I find that I actually like my life!

    I'm so behind on my reading - I had a very busy week. Sorry I haven't been by in a while :o)

    ps...I love making dinner with Scout playing on the floor, digging in the drawers and getting in the pantry to play on his shelf - throwing everything all over. Makes me smile. His sister did the same thing when she was his age.


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